all God needs is Gravity to hold me down...

So, once again mshojotoho has great little whatever they're called. So I put in my name, then my dog Mocha's name. Below is Mocha, and the oddly apt name they gave her.




It seems quite apt, don't you think?

Definitely not a genius...ah well. wasting time. from mshojotoho 

....One to go. Year one is O-V-E-R. Can't believe it.

I'm due for an update. All my latest entries have been blogthings---not that nothing's been going on, just not sure I want to have it read.


Semester's over. It was a tough one. Teacher issues. They're getting worked out, though. It just feels like now the semester's over, the work really begins. I have a LOT of  rep to learn for the summer and the fall coming, have to decide where to audition, have to get headshots, have to not get overwhelmed too easily.

Part of me wishes I'd been a bit more aggressive with the auditions for summer programs, but I chose to listen to my teacher and stay small this summer as far as programs and I still think it was the right decision. BUT...it's a bit hard to watch all my friends and fellow students prepping for summer roles, full or partial. I just have to keep telling myself  "You're going to Italy. Italy. Nico Castel. Italy." I will get a scene, and more importantly, more technique work and coaching than I know what to do with. It's a small program and the beauty of it is that you get as much or as little as you want--gimme what you got.

The voice is getting there. The last few weeks were tough with being sick and the last week of rep classes and juries was rough, but it's over and I sang well, if not my personal best. But what I'm trying to focus on is the overall end result of the year, which is a significantly improved technique. Control over the top as far as releasing a lot of the unnecessary muscle and heaviness  is starting to come together...I may actually have something bordering on "floaty" soon! My teacher gave me Depuis le Jour as a stretch aria specifically to work on that issue. Yeah. My eyebrows shot up too. But, turns out, it's not so bad. Performable? Hells no. But more within reach than I thought.

Thanks saengerin

Haiku2 for vagabond79
oxygen levels dropping dangerously low and ends high ahuuuuuuuuaaaahhhh
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UCAUTION

IN THE INTEREST OF SAFETY IT IS ADVISABLE TO KEEP VAGABOND AWAY FROM FIRE AND FLAMES.

Username:

From Go-Quiz.com

So I was assigned to watch Cecilia Bartoli--not to copy any technique, never you fear!! But because of her facial expressions--not to copy those either, but just to see how a famous opera singer doesn't care about what her face looks like...it's a long story! But watching this, I'm asking different questions.

1.)First off, Cecilia Bartoli, much respect. But HOW does she a.)preserve her voice and 2.) keep the integrity of her music/respect of the musical world with all that friggin' AIR in her interpretation? Ay Dios Mio!


And then I found this, which is both freakish and awe-inspiring at the same time. Holy Freakin' Cow Batman.

Don't know who she is yet, just stumbled across the videos, but I LOVE her so far! Imagine that, advocating for the vocalists! This is sort of my reaction to a piece of grafitti on a poster in our conservatory elevator: "Singers don't F****** practice." Wish I could get my hands on the pansy ass instrumentalist who wrote that, and tell them a little bit about what we really do with our bodies. Anyway, this lady is awesome!

Just had ta use this icon....tee hee!

Oddlly enough, I feel pretty good just now. Very content.

 Rather boring, stuck at home weekend, but lately stuck at home ain't such a bad thang.

The Patriots are playing the Bengals in an hour. They'd better get on the ball and kick butt or this happy cow ain't gonna be so happy anymore.

I'm just having way too much fun with this, I think. I have a profile up on a dating site. There, I said it. Considering all the hotties at my school are gay and I don't get out anywhere else right now, I figured I'd give it a shot--it's free, why not? So I've met a couple nice guys, (not in person, don't know if I'll actually go THERE yet) but the FUN part is shootin' down the idiots!!!

So today I'm online checking for email from this guy that I really like and there's mail! But it's from another guy I don't know.  Disappointment descends, but I click his profile to see who's this person interested in moi? Nothing against the older folks, but he's 50!!  I'm 27 and not a hollywood starlet and he's DEFINITELY NOT George Clooney. But he seems like a sweet guy, seems educated, so I go to see what he has to say to me.

TWO WORDS: "your hot." 

Obviously he thinks this'll get me because:
1. Bad grammar is SUCH a turn-on.
2. I'm so desperate that a 50 man telling me I'm hot is going to make me quiver with delight.

I was ticked off at this guy and here was my response:

"Thank you. While I appreciate the compliment, you are older than my father. Please stick to the above thirty crowd, this isn't Hollywood, and I'm not desperate. "

hee. that was too much fun.

..was enjoy the aria "Ebben n'andro lontana"! I found some great stuff too, and I should have stopped there....but my curiosity got the better of me fer sher.

It's obvious to me that we have found a way to link to another dimension and download thier crazy juice.

Well, actually a few do come to mind.
Huh?
Cheese.
Super cheese
Tasteless.
Huh?
What's with the cheap looking floaty thingy that looks vaguely suggestive?
This makes no sense.
Huh?
Classy, um, no.
Yeah, this is a way to make opera appealing and relevant--brings to mind cheesy russian music v...oh wait, she's Russian! Now it all makes sense.
*sighs in disgust*
BTW, I can talk, I'm Russian. I know just how cheesy it can get.

Yes she can.

Had my first class performance today in Aria class with the venerated Michael Strauss. Sang Pleurez, Pleurez. It's never perfect, but man did I sing it better than I EVER have....at 10 'O freakin' clock in the morning. Put the fear of God into those snooty opera majors, which was a big bonus, (not that I wouldn't LOVE to be one--opera major, I mean) and pretty much won the respect of Michael "Doesn't he just give you a talent boner?" Strauss. Yep, got that from a second year grad the other day. I guess he kind of does. He sure knows his stuff, that's fer darn sure, and gave me some incredible stylistic insights. Who doesn't love a class where you basically get free coaching?

Have to make this feeling last a while....once again I got passed over, this time for a Master Class series with the VERY worshipped Sanford Sylvan. Starting to think TOO worshipped. At first I felt like, what do I have to do? Walk in naked so's they notice me? But then I looked closely at the names and started to recognize repeats from other audition lists and....yep, Mr. Sylvan obviously has his favorites. Oh well. At least I kicked ass in Aria class, and that's only after one week of class! I can't wait for juries.... Bwahaha...*sneaky villain hand washing*

....'cause it's so dang cute. and it's how I feel! Content.

I had a great/horrible week, now it's over, and I was rescued from my predicament by dear friends and my mom and dad. The feeling of  "okay, I'm going to make it now," is so amazing and all I can say is  THANKYOU!!!

The moment we try to do things on our own is usually the moment we realize we really need help.

Off to do something amazing--buy groceries!!!

Found on saengerin 's page.

yeah, so I'm a big dork,  but I already knew that.

( Read more... )

....and mystified. hee. it rhymes. I am so tired....

Painting, moving, trying to find a job, keeping the family happy, worrying about auditions and tests with nearly 0 time to study or prepare, although Renaissance composers are in my thoughts from today's study session: yay Obrecht, Lassus and des Prez! Yay Palestrina, Dufay, Dunstable and Gabrieli! heh. Just proving to myself that I remember SOMETHING from undergrad music history.

Staying up too late to get things done, waking up too early, wearing down fast. At least my back muscles are getting a work out! I sure do feel them, not in a bad way though. Losing weight, that's a good side effect of never stopping doing.

*Yawwwn*

How can one be doing so much and still it's not enough? I have a sneaky suspicion it's begun and it's not going to stop.

So yesterday I dropped my friend off at the airport--she'd been here for a visit--and proceeded to my Sunday afternoon standby, Barnes and Noble, for my cofee and People and whatever else I find.

I'm in the Starbucks part, and who do I see? Or think I see? Renee Fleming. She was so dressed down, like the grungy Hollywood people who try to 'blend' with the people, but she had the ubiquitous huge Chanel sunglasses to cover her tired eyes. It's probably not her, but it could have been her twin!!

And then this morning I looked up her website and she's opening for Boston Symphony on the 29th, which increases the plausibility factor. But would she really be here this early on and in FRAMINGHAM? I think not. But I would still swear it was her. Like I said, weird.

She is. DRIVING. Me. NUUUUTTTS!!!


Analise is doing well, better and better everyday, although Isha (my boss, her mother) is particularly tense between last week's battle with Analise's health, my leaving for school, and the upheaval of the house interior being painted-(her $7000+ B-day present from Tim). Mess always makes her edgy, which makes everyone in the house edgy, and gives me a stomach ache. "I'M SURROUNDED BY ASSASSINS!" Is her favorite thing to scream at the top of her lungs, as is what sounds like a viking battle cry that starts low and ends high, ("ahuuuUUUUUAAAAHHHH!) like she did yesterday when the plumbing in the downstairs bathroom leaked all over--the drain came loose and of course the painters must have done it. "Every time someone steps in this house it costs me hundreds of dollars! I'm sick of this! Why is it always me! Why, why can't for ONCE something go right?!?!?!" (direct quote, by the way, forever burned in my memory as my cereal dinner curdled in my mouth even as I was eating it.)

*sigh* One can only sympathize with her. She is mightily put-upon, what with her having to work 9am-12pm yesterday, not at all the day before, or today, or next Monday, and only 9-12 M-Th as her regular hours, and usually not even that much. Oh, and the fact that she doesn't mow her own lawn, paint her own walls, wash her own laundry, dress her own daughter or clean her own house is mighty trying as well. Poor, poor lady. She is indeed afflicted and tried in this life. I don't know how she will make it through. Heh.

Snarkiness is my only outlet with this insanity. You know it's bad when you practically get an ulcer because you remember too late that you left drops of water IN THE SINK that's otherwise pristine and poor thing, she has to compulsively wipe them off herself. Or, she comes home to a clean house, but the dishwasher HASN'T BEEN EMPTIED! Horrors! What could have led to this travesty? Oh, that's right, they are piping hot still and stupid me, *slaps forehead*, I thought I'd let them cool off before I put them away. What did I do the next time? Burned my hands putting them away so I wouldn't have to listen to her mumble and grumble about the "assassin" (hey, that's me!!) that's out to get her.

MOVING OUT 9/1--a day for rejoicing.

From luxperpetua
...this thing hits it on the nose, except for the "no emotional attatchment". I get very emotionally attatched to people!

vagabond took the free ColorQuiz.com personality test! "Her need to feel more causative and to have a wide..." Click here to read the rest of the results.

Things did get worse before they got better. It was scary, really, really scary. One moment she was going down, heart rate, oxygen levels dropping dangerously low, and the next the fever had broken, not a moment to soon, and her vitals started to stabilize. Thank God! She exhausted, in a lot of pain and very, very vocal about said pain, :) , but it's a good thing that she even cares about it! She's doing much, much better. Still no answers as to what this was, even with every test known to man done on her, the best they can do is refer ambiguously to a "viral infection" of some sort. It looks like she's fought off the worst, but they're keeping her for a while just to make sure it's really, truly gone.

Thanks for prayers and the incense! :)

I went to see her this evening, and the meds are keeping the nausea and fever down to the point where she's a bit more comfortable, but as soon as the meds wear off, the nausea and fever spike right back up. Her temp was 103 when they brought her in this morning, and she was hallucinating, talking to her dad and dog when they weren't there. Her bowels are inflamed and not moving, there's fluid in her pelvis, blood in her urine and a high white cell count. If all the tests come back negative, it'll probably get chalked up to an MMR recation from the 5 year vaccines she got 10 days ago. We just thought of that tonight. We'd all been wracking our brains to what might have caused all this, from the tick she had two weeks ago to the fair to the sprinkler park. *sigh* I hope it's just that simple as a reaction to the vaccines, and that her appendix doesn't inflame as a result of her bowel inflammation.

I am having the most peculiar reaction to all of this. I trust, I believe that she is in the Lord's hands, that she will be okay, but I'm crying at the drop of a hat, and I think it's because I'm simply a spectator at this point and not facilitating her care. If I'm doing the cargiving, there could be blood everywhere and I'd be fine, calm, cool, just doing what needs to be done. But being helpless in the situation, not even being able to sit with her and comfort her is causing this weird reaction where I'm going through the day, fine and rational, and then the next moment I'm still fine and rational, but leaking through the eyes uncontrollably. My baby is in pain and there's nothing, nothing, nothing, that I can do to effect her healing except pray, bring her her favorite books and doll, and tell her I love her.